Lewis's Life Story,
Once upon a time there was a little shriveled, green, alien baby named Lewis. Both his parents were aliens who looked like humans, so they did not expect their child to look so unusual. It was quite a surprise when Lewis was born.
His big eyes and chiseled chin made the alien nurses drool! They couldn’t believe their own eyes. Not only was this baby so unusual looking, but when he opened his mouth, the most beautiful music came out. As a child, the strapping young lad constantly received special attention, mostly because of his remarkable appearance. His parents watched him closely, hoping he would eventually look more human. And eventually he did!
One day when he was 7 years, 3 months, and 29 days old he came upon a secret garden. The hunch-backed old farmer presented little Lewis with a bag of magical mushrooms. Upon sifting through the contents of the bag he came upon a vial of potion. The potion was a thick orange soup which had magical powers. Lewis was forever changed after sipping the vial of delicious magical soup.
With every sip of this magical potion, Lewis felt an odd bubbling within his stomach. Since the soup tasted like cotton candy and sauerkraut, the poor little boy didn’t notice the fantastic changes taking place all over his body. Lewis’s legs grew 2 feet and sprouted broccoli! His skin turned a sparkly tickle-me-pink, and a strange kind of hairy, black, curly froth grew from the top of his head.
Now, the biggest problem with all of these changes was the tickle-me-pink sparkly skin. You see, all the girls fall helplessly in love with his skin and have a terribly hard time keeping their tickling hand away from his body. This was an especially difficult problem for Lewis because he was VERY ticklish, and when he is tickled he makes a rather obnoxious noise. He cackled like a hen laying an egg, a very difficult egg to lay, I might add.
This was a major problem because his laugh attracted all the llamas in the city to him. They would break out of their cages and charge at him. This made everyone in the city really angry because they kept losing all their llamas due to their suicidal tendencies.
Baaaad Llama! Baaaad Llama! Lewis screamed as he tried desperately to run away. Just as he was about to turn the corner, the mother of all llamas stared him straight in the eyes, as drool fell from her big wet lips. All Lewis could do was open his mouth an d start singing the only song that came to his mind…
“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are grey…” and as he sang, he noticed that the llama mama just became more and more agitated. Just as this huge and crazed llama was about to devour him whole, young Lewis recalled that he still had the bag of mushrooms given to him by the hunch-backed farmer. Figuring that he probably had nothing to lose at this point, he pulled out the bag of magical mushrooms and started to feed them to the frenzied Mama Llama Mama, and she began to shrink.
Now, the shrinking of the mama llama caused a lot of confusion. You see, the mama llama didn’t look or act like a Mama Llama so all the other llamas went looking for her. Lewis definitely lucked out!
Now that the llama drama was over, Lewis had time to focus on important endeavors like playing chess, watching movies, and slaying dragons. On the day that Lewis turned 15 years, 4 months, and 2 days, the chief alien warlock summoned him to his purple cake palace. It turns out, there was a purple cake eater monster on the loose! The chief alien warlock wanted Lewis to lead the Legion of Young, Muscley men to destroy this horrid monster. Lewis accepted immediately. This wonderful, brave, young man ran all the way through the castle until he accidentally ran smack into the chief alien warlock’s daughter Isalizoramanishoe.
At the sight of her earlobe, Lewis’s heart stopped for 10 whole seconds. When it finally restarted, he knew it was love at first sight. He now knew what people meant when they said that they were “triturated”. As he looked into Isalizoramanishoe’s golden eyes, Lewis forgot all about the purple cake eater monster. Like a dream, he swept her into a waltz. Unfortunately, it was at that moment the purple cake eater monster turned the corner.
“One, two, three….One, two, three..” “Don’t step on my foot” screamed Isalizoramanishoe! Lewis was taken by surprise due to the hoarse tone of her voice. He grinned and just kept waltzing. It was then that Lewis started to smell something very horrid. As he twirled Isalizoramanishoe around one last time he dropped her out of sheek fear. The purple cake eater monster crawled slowly licking it’s hideous teeth. Lewis remembered that if he ever faced a monster, the first thing he needed to do was yodel the Roman alphabet.
As the yodeling proceeded, the purple cake eater monster fell fast asleep. Lewis then locked it in a cage so that it could not cause anymore troubles for the kingdom. Now, Isalizoramanishoe was so grateful to Lewis that she told him about a family secret. She said that there was a forest where some magical flowers grew. If he would eat this flower he would then turn into a normal looking human alien.
So Lewis and Isalizoramanishoe went searching for this forest. After a month and 22 days of searching they finally found the flower that would change Lewis's life forever. When he ate it, the flower tasted like watermelon and limes, much better than the potion he drank earlier in his life. After waiting a day and a half, Lewis started feeling light in the head. He started seeing colors flying around in front of his eyes, speaking in tongues, and he became delirious. After 15 days, Lewis finally opened his eyes to find that he looked like every other human alien on the planet. He started dancing around like a leprechaun and singing.
Well now that Lewis looked like a normal everyday human alien, he could finally go to school without being made fun of or attracting all the llamas. He started school at the age of 16. Fortunately, Lewis had a lot of life experience so he was a very accelerated learner. Therefore he graduated after only 3 and a half years. And the rest is history.......
Well that's all folks!!!! Hope you liked it:)
